Folks, we're tip-toein' into the Dark Days here...
I just sat for 10 minutes trying to come up with a catchy title to this post to somehow reflect how I feel about this Twins team. I wanted it to convey how much I hate Matt Crapps, how piss-poor the decisions of the front office have been, how utterly awful in every facet of the game the entire team has been... but then, just like watching the Twins this season, that became boring. I literally zoned out and stared at the white background of the preview window. And that, in a nutshell, is the Twins season.
Boring. Holy god, the Twins are boring this year. I can't tell you how many times I've just simply not been aware the Twins are playing this summer. Countless nights I have driven home, happily listening to talk radio instead of their radio broadcasts. They were on Fox a few weeks ago, and I read on the porch instead. I READ. A BOOK.
Allow me to quote from an email I sent to Mr. Bliznewski on May 24, 2007. Now, this was in the context of a conversation about the Wolves (little did we know that a certain someone would be traded two months later, thus ending the ability of that team to ever compete again, ever), but I needed some reference point for what was happening, so I turned, as I often do, to the Twins:
I'm a solutions person. I don't like to sit around
and see things fucked up and not do anything. I need
to have some goal, some light at the end of the
tunnel. For the Twins, this light is the years
between 2008-2011, when His Holiness Joe Mauer hits
his prime, as does The Son Francisco Liriano, not to
mention the continued domination of His Highness Johan
Santana. Those will be GOOD YEARS. And if we have to
suck a lil prick this season, no problem. Because
everything's going to get better from now until we're
34 years old.
And, that's that.
Well, you can't say I missed with my predictions. 2008-2011 DID indeed represent a sort of "peak" among the organization, it just wasn't the peak we hoped for. Santana had to go away because he needed too much money, and that's ok. Liriano hasn't been consistent since his arm detached from his body, and he never will be again. He threw a no-hitter against the White Sox, but I think I could do that tomorrow, if needed.
The point is that this peak has come and gone, and now begins the slow slide. At least in 2007, I could objectively look at what was coming on the horizon and find legitimate reason to be optimistic. Sure, Lew Ford featured prominently in the offense at that time. But there were whispers and reports of a man called "Span" roaming the minor leagues, just waiting for his shot. There was also a stable of young arms, and draft picks seemed to be working out for the most part. Spending was kept low, there was a new stadium on the horizon, and it all seemed to be coming up Millhouse.
The cupboard is now bare, people.
The best pitcher in the minor leagues has a wonky elbow. The position players have all been tapped, and they suck. Luke Hughes, Trevor Plouffe, Matt Tolbert. They all suck. The Twins went out and signed a Japanese short stop... he turns out to suck at baseball. They get a good year out of Thome, then overpay him and watch him suck. Kubel hits a peak, but will be gone because he's too expensive. They give Joe the big contract, he starts to suck, then they TRADE the best hitter they have in the minor leagues, who just happens to be a catcher. This results in Drew Butera starting many games. Justin Morneau will never be the same. There are absolutely no other players in the minor leagues worth a damn. None. "Who's the next right fielder?" Nobody. He'll be below replacement level.
We all know what happened monetarily... the Twins suddenly were able to spend huge amounts of money and forgot how to develop players. I was worried that it would happen, and then it happened. We became Houston.
And so, here we are. A boring team that is going to get worse before it gets better. A team with few tradeable pieces, and no support in the minor leagues. An aging team that has regressed almost across the board. And a front office that will likely try to spend their way out of this mess, and end up like the White Sox. If I was to write a similar email to Mr. Driznewski now (and the parts about the Wolves would be the exact same, I guarantee you), I would likely proclaim that I don't envision the Twins being good again until I turn 40.
Oh god, that's depressing.
