Monday, August 2, 2010

(The door slams shut)

Look, I'm sick of this shit. We just got swept by the fucking GIANTS! Those cocksuckers did whatever they want to us. You know the last time we were swept by the Giants when I managed the Dodgers? 1993! Which...I guess...







Tommy, I understand what you're saying. We've just made some very exciting deals to help the team. I think we're still in it.




"We have some people saying 'woe is me' every time things don't go their way instead of just grinding it out. I hear someone say 'that's a really good pitcher.' All these guys are good pitchers. They make a good pitch, then foul it off." "No one is going to put a hand down to help you up. Where's the sense of urgency?"






See, Larry is exactly right. We're running out of time. You know how I feel when I see the bottle of my award-winning wine is running low? I get one at the ready. This way, my meal doesn't get screwed up. That make sense to you guys? It's OK, Andre, you can come in here. There's no curve balls around.






Hey guys, my wife just had a baby. I wish I could have helped this weekend. But, you know, duty calls.





Hey guys, I know it's been a while since I was a good player...it might even be back to when Trip was a Cubs fan...but don't worry! I just need to get adjusted to these new surroundings. Seriously, everything is cool. Coach Bowa, I-





Easy...Larry, let's all calm down. We don't need to...now, wait a minute.









EVERY TEAM AHEAD OF US HAS TO LOSE AND WE HAVE TO WIN THEM ALL! YOU HEAR ME? 58 PLAYOFF GAMES. GUYS ARE UP THERE GIVING AT-BATS AWAY. ASK MATT KEMP ABOUT THAT...IF I HAD HIS TOOLS, I'D BE IN COOPERSTOWN! DO YOU KNOW WHAT IF FEELS LIKE TO FUCKING GO FULL BORE FOR NINE INNINGS?!





Mamma Mia!




1 comment:

Dickfer said...

Trip is no longer a Cubs fan?